I was sent in an email a link to a Boing Boing item today, regarding a Republican candidate’s fundraiser which invites people to shoot doves! Boy, that’s a knee-slapper if I ever heard one. You see, it’s bird hunting, but the bird in question is a dove, and anti-war people are also referred to as doves. I don’t think that will ever get old.
Anyway, I thought I’d use this just hysterical bit of news to share some other Republican humor, to show that we too can be funny. For instance, here’s one of my favorites:
What do you get when you cross a Democrat and a pilgrim?
A God-fearing tax collector who gives thanks for what other people have!
Funny, right? Take a minute to catch your breath before you read on. I don’t want you to get a tummy ache from laughing too hard. Okay, ready? Here’s another one:
What’s the difference between a Democrat and a catfish?
One’s a scum-sucking bottom-feeder and the other one is a fish!
That right there is comedy gold! And classy to boot. And now, one more.
What’s the difference between a Democrat and a bag of dog poop?
Another timeless joke, if I do say so myself. Now obviously I didn’t write those jokes. They were told to me, and because they are so funny, I am telling them to you. Because people always say, “Republicans just aren’t funny. Look at the best comedians — Bill Hicks, Richard Pryor, George Carlin — all of them lean toward the left.”
Well, no sir!
Okay. Maybe those three do, but they’re not the only funny comedians. What about Larry the Cable Guy? Huh? That guy is funny, I don’t care what anyone says! He’s easily as good as the three guys I mentioned above.
I mean: Larry the Cable Guy is proof, hard evidence that Republicans are easily as funny as Democrats, and more importantly, Republican humor is true! And to prove it, I’ll end with one more joke. I know I said “one more” one joke ago, but I’m in a giving mood!
How many Democrats does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Just one, but that light bulb REALLY gets screwed!
(I just can’t stop laughing!)